Upon hearing 'Conspiracy Theory', this Blue One thinks of Mel Gibson's
1997 movie with co-star Julia Roberts, not crazy and off-the-wall
plots thought up by the federal government to keep us happy and in our
place. I'm sure they have better things to do than hide Elvis or
anything. But that never stops some individuals from believing every
single rumour tidbit of information that they find suspicious, only
then to twist them to fit their strange and quirky ideas.
After seeing Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring - Special
Edition, and watching all the extra features, one gets to know the
actors and their strange ways doing things, as well as accents, fears,
and their sense of humour. Now, I don't claim to be an expert on the
personal lives of entire cast (if any at all), nor do I plan on
becoming so, but some fans think they should, do and have become
frighteningly obsessed about it to the point where you think 'Are these
people even human?'
I'm not just talking about the topic of 'Real Person Fiction', which is
just disturbing and wrong in itself, but the whole fact of an
individual claiming that they know about the secret life of a celebrity
and announce it to the world; somewhere along the lines of the
supermarket tabloid papers, but to a greater extent.
What exactly I'm referring to is what has been deemed 'Domlijah';
Dominic Monaghan and Elijah Wood's secret love affair. That's right!
They are gay, but are not allowed to 'come out of the closet' because
of "evil" public relation people, New Line Cinema and their standards
and the reputation they must maintain. I dare editorialize when I say
"Puleaze. I'm sorry, but what are these people smoking, and whatever it
is, it can not be healthy in any way, shape or form! Where do these
people get such stupidity?"
The people with this 'theory' have been deemed "Tinhats" and rightly
so. They say that they have proof of their theory of the union
between the two movie stars and will have words of all who disagree
with them. Leading this unruly band of lack-brained individuals is one
MsAllegro who I have deemed 'Balistic-Banner'. She has a reputation of
tracking down people who have posted anti-domlijah topics on her forum
and banning their IP address to prevent any further disagreements.
And the proof of their deranged accusations? The fact that they make
observations from photos of the pair, twist their words from interviews
and the very fact that Dom and Elijah actually go and post on their
forum under 'anonymous' and tell the board themselves. Other posters
who call themselves 'insiders' say that they know Dom and Elijah and
are getting the news straight from the source. They have information on
what they call 'shoutouts', which can take the form of what colours of
clothing Dom and Elijah are wearing to confirm their genuine gayness to
the Tinhats.
Why haven't we heard this before in newspapers, or magazines? The evil
PR people have made sure that we haven't and there's even more to that.
Sean Astin is one of two 'villains' helping the PR to supress the
public's knowledge of Dom and Elijah's love. But he isn't the
only LotR cast to be involved with the cover-up; the magnificent actor
Ian McKellen is as well, but not to the extent that Sean is.
But McKellen has said straight out that he is gay and New Line and the
PR haven't censored him. Why? "Because he's old and unattractive."
Right. So all of Mckellen's gay activistism and efforts for gay rights
are proving him a hypocrite now for he is part of a gay-crushing
cover-up? Yes. It all makes sense now.
And how could this tabloid love story be complete without a woman to
"prove" that Elijah is, in fact, as gay as they come? Franka Potente
from the film "Run Lola, Run" was once photographed kissing Elijah.
Potente is RP proof that Elijah could never be gay, for he dates women!
'See? He's straight!'
To top the whole thing off, here is the clincher and one that angers me
more than anything: Elijah is being compared to Jesus Christ as the
"Gay Messiah". When Elijah finally breaks free of the PR people and
reveals to the world that he is gay, he will lead all gay actors into a
new era of Hollywood as the perfect role model and gay oppression will
cease.
Where-ever these individuals are getting these ideas that they truly
and deeply believe in, no one truly knows and probably will never know.
In my opinion, compared to these Tinhats, Mel Gibson's Jerry Fletcher
appears 100% sane and should be given a high honour for his insight of
all things. Give the man a metal!